Boogers, Barf and Boys

We set out for our Valentine's dinner.  Post-kids, Hubby and I typically just hang out at the house and have steaks on the grill, but it was a gorgeous day and we just felt like getting out of the house.

I should have recognized the foreshadowing taking place as we entered the parking lot, as to what would ensue inside the restaurant.  Dax exclaimed in his loudest squeal, "Mommy, you CAN eat boogers if you just give yummy boogers a chance!"  I don't think I have to explain the conversation in the car prior to this newly discovered hypothesis of a three year old.  

Nonetheless, hubby and I forged ahead with the dinner plans, giggling a bit as Dax was still shrieking of his new discovery.  We got the boys out of their car seats.  Zane was insistent on wearing bright yellow gloves before he would get out of the car.  Ok. Whatever will keep him happy.  We manage to make our way into the restaurant and are seated at a table waaaay in the back corner.  Perfect.  Less people to annoy.  

This particular restaurant serves buckets of peanuts while you wait.  The kids love it because you can throw the peanut shells on the floor.  I knew giving Zane a peanut was a little questionable but he really wanted one, so I caved, and gave my two year old, half a peanut.  He did pretty good with it, so I gave him a few more. 

At the precise moment the server set the tray down to give us our food.  Zane starts to choke on a peanut.  It is a loud display of  hacking, coughing and crazy burping sounds.  Then, he projectile vomits onto the table.  nice.  I send a little prayer up to God thanking Him for not letting my child choke.  Then, I assure everyone around us that he isn't sick, he just choked on a peanut.

After four bites of my fillet, Zane discovered that the little string dangling on the wall, behind his head, would turn the neon Miller Light sign off, then on, then off, then on....etc.  After threatening him within an inch of his life, he finally stopped messing with the light.  

He did focus for a whole five minutes eating his macaroni and cheese, so I got to enjoy most of my food.

Then, as if he didn't learn his lesson the first time, he was wanting the bucket of peanuts again. Hubby and I set the bucket at the edge of the table and Zane was reaching across me to get to it.  I caught his arm so he wouldn't get another peanut, and when I did, he squirmed and knocked my ICE COLD water in my crotch.  I shrieked.  When I stood up in my light colored blue jeans, the water spot was nice and dark in a perfect circle in the front AND back.  Like I had really pee'd myself.  

A few concerned half-smiles and a few grimaces from our dinning neighbors and I was out.  I took the kids as Tate paid and shoveled the rest of his fillet in his mouth.  I marched back through the entire restaurant, modeling my crotch soaked pants in all their glory, for all the Valentines crowed to see.  

When we got in the car, Zane and his big, blue, sad eyes, said, "I thawee I piwlen uer wada, mommy."

Sigh.  I just couldn't love him any more.  

Elixir

28 degrees.
Early morning.
Frozen shimmery dew on the ground that crunches beneath your feet with each step.
Steam coming out of your mouth like a locomotive, because at this moment, that is what you are.
It all adds up to the perfect elixir.
An elixir called running....and the faster you run, the faster you drink it in.

This elixir cured the following ailments for me this morning, and it only took 47 minutes:
-lack of patience with my kids
-lack of patience with my husband
-lack of patience with myself
-lack of wanting to clean the house
-lack of wanting to cook anything other than chocolate

If your patience is wearing thin, and you're just in an all-around funk, lace up those shoes and go run!  You will feel like a new person. Be warned...you could come down with the following side-effects:
-weight loss
-a healthy glow in your complexion
-a smile
-a sense of accomplishment
-a good mood

After being in my own funk after my marathon...um...2 months ago, I now feel like kicking a shopping cart and yelling, "I'M BACK", like Will Ferrell on "Old School"!

Super Bowl Wednesday

What to do on this mid-week day being snowed in yet again? 

Turn on that DVR'ed Super Bowl Game, make some killer wings and just pretend it's Super Bowl Sunday again! 

First, bring enough cans of beer to a boil that the liquid will cover the wings.  Hubby called it alcohol abuse that I would use a 6 pack of beer to boil chicken.  I was slightly forgiven when I pointed out the I was actually using only 5 cans of beer because I was drinking one.  The reason I have so many different kinds of beer is because I didn't want to deplete one particular kind of beer in the beer fridge.  I'm so thoughtful.

This is what beer looks like when it comes to a boil.  Who knew?

Boil the chicken for about 10 minutes.  Here, I used 2 bags of wings.

When it's almost completely done, remove it from the beer and put it in a single layer in a roasting pan.  

Brush it lightly with a mixture of one bottle of Louisiana Hot Sauce and one stick of melted butter.  Make sure you put the beer/chicken broth in the freezer, it will make a yummy broth the next time you are making soup!  Um, perhaps I need a new brush.

Cook in the oven on 450 until crispy.  It won't be as crispy as being deep fried, but I guess it is slightly healthier.  Serve with extra wing sauce for dipping.  Don't forget the carrots, celery and blue cheese!  The perfect combo to make you forget your snowed-in on a Wednesday!

Snow Ice Cream

Snow Ice Cream with Chole....my boys' best friend.

We have a nature trail across from our house.  We always go exploring after a rain to see what animal tracks are left in the mud overnight.  Saturday, we got to go exploring with Chole in the snow!  We found deer, coyote and rabbit tracks.

We went sledding too!  As you can see, the sled was really a shower liner, which is just a really thick piece of plastic.  Luckily, we had this laying around since we are remodeling our bathrooms right now.  This was the best sled we've ever had.  Typically, we use either a giant gift bag or a trash can lid.  Neither work out very well, as you can imagine.  It snows so rarely here, it doesn't make sense to buy a real sled.  I don't want it taking up space in the garage so we can use it, maybe, once a year.  However, I do think I'll keep a shower liner rolled up small in the garage from now on, because that was fun! :)

The kids had more fun falling off the "sled" than actually sledding.   This resulted in three adorable little giggling bundles of rosy cheeks, fuzzy mittens, snotty noses and snow-caked boots purposefully flailing themselves off the sled about every two feet. They were helpless to their own deep belly laughter.  You know the laugh I'm talking about, your cheeks hurt, your sides hurt, your eyes water and you can't even make yourself stand up.  Sometimes you can't even breathe.  I finally had to coax the soaked, freezing, sunburned little munchkins inside with the promise they could make there very own snow ice cream.

Of course, we had to top it with the homemade chocolate sauce I made the day before (recipe in previous post).  I have no idea why they wouldn't take a nap.

Homemade Chocolate Sauce

We have had the craaaaziest weather here in Dallas the past week.  Last night we got about 7 inches of snow, on top of an already 2 inch layer of ice, and it's still coming down.  Of course, this had to happen during Super Bowl week.  So, now the rest of the country's image of Texas has been confirmed.  We, Texans, have absolutely NO idea how to drive in snow and ice, nor do we have sufficient winter weather gear for even getting out in the stuff.  I'm not going to lie, I am one of these people.  However, I am aware of my inabilities,  so my car has not moved from the driveway since Monday. 

After my boys played in the snow for a bit, they were frozen to the bone.  Dax asked for hot chocolate.  I got out the cocoa powder, but then realized I didn't have any marshmallows.  I can only imagine the reaction I would have gotten if I had given my 2 and 3 year-old hot chocolate without marshmallows. So, I scrambled around the kitchen to see what I could cook up for my boys, out of the ingredients I had on hand.

 I ended up making a sinfully delicious chocolate sauce!  This was one of those times when your experiment ends up better than a recipe.

The first batch I made, I got off the internet and it called for cocoa, sugar, water and vanilla.  I made that, and it was ok......BUT THEN, the Paula Deen came out in me and said, "I bet this would be really good with a stick of butter in it!"  The following recipe is my tweaked second batch and will make you cuddle up in a blanket and eat about 4 bowls of ice cream while watching the snow fall!

Melt a stick of butter in a saucepan.
Throw in 2 giant blobs of Vanilla Ice Cream.  Yes, "blob" is a technical measuring term.
Add 1 2/3 cups of white sugar.
Add 2/3 cup of Cocoa Powder.
Add 2 Tsp of Vanilla.
Cook over medium heat until sauce is smooth and sugar is not grainy anymore.
Spoon it piping hot over vanilla ice cream!
Watch your little boys forget they ever said anything about wanting hot chocolate!

Cabin Fever

Day 2 of being iced in.  Not snowed in.  If we were snowed in we could actually build a snowman or something fun like that.  We did attempt going sledding on our 2 inches of solid ice.  Living in Texas we don't have a sled on hand.  So, we used a giant gift bag and a jump rope.  It worked for about 4 minutes, but that was really all we could handle being outside with a wind chill of -2 anyway.  Here is what I've done to entertain my boys (ages 3 and 2) on these days with no play dates or sandbox fun.  Feel free to add your own ideas....as you can see, I really need them!!!

1)  Turn off the TV, and turn on some music.
2)  Get off the computer and put away the iphone.

3)  Do a really complex and time-consuming art project.

Hey, I never said we were a crafty bunch.

.  

4)  Make dough shapes.  Mix Bisquick and milk until a play-doh like consistency.  We can also learn our letters!

It's a good snack...before and after it's cooked.  Most prefer it cooked.

Sigh.  He's two.  He doesn't know the difference between Play-Doh and Bisquick.  He thinks everything is tasty.

 5)  Pretend the crib is a boat and go fishing for green monster arms.

6)  Get out old Halloween costumes.  Is that Buzz Lightyear's helmet or a dunce cap? 

6)  When you get tired of all that, you can always just let them run wild.  Drink wine so they bug you less.  Here, I got in trouble by the hubby because I used a 2002 Private Selection to make Beef Burgundy in the crock pot this morning.  Oops.  I suppose I should... A) learn my wine better, and B) drink the rest so it doesn't go to waste.  

What do you do with your kids on snow days?